Due to the ongoing global drop in birth rates, especially in modernized countries, there is growing interest in the so-called “global fertility crisis.” However, the term “fertility crisis” is a little deceptive. It’s not truly a crisis, and it has nothing to do with fertility. What we’re witnessing is more of a reaction to cultural stressors, economic challenges, and a rising realization of the fallacious logic underlying the expectation of procreation. These pressures have been exacerbated by overbearing governments, an increasingly restrictive work culture, the need for a dual-income household, and the rising cost of living relative to income. Like me, many make the decision not to have children after realizing that an aggressive push for procreation is frequently motivated by false beliefs about the meaning of life, self-purpose, a concern for legacy, or a sense of duty to future generations.

Many parents I meet seem to harbor a quiet, unspoken resentment about having children, often expressing a palpable sense of relief when they drop their kids off at school or daycare as if they can finally breathe. Or to put it more briefly, being a parent sucks. It’s telling how frequently they’ll jump at the chance to pawn their child off onto someone else, whether it’s a grandparent, babysitter, friend, or organizations such as the Scouts or Boys & Girls Club, to escape the hard job of raising them, if even for a moment. I see parents losing pieces of their identity, putting their own needs, dreams, and ambitions on hold to meet the constant demands of parenting. To be considered a “good” parent, you have to give up so much of what makes you. For me, this level of self-sacrifice, with very little return on investment, is a major reason why I find the idea of parenting unappealing and why I see kids as more of a burden than a joy. It’s expected that, as a parent, you present your life with your children as happy and blissful, but in reality, many parents are miserable. 

Most of my friends at this point have children. And generally, I’m happy to be Uncle Adam—for at most an hour. I’ve expressed at length my views on this subject and am often met with something like “You’ll change your mind one day.” I was once told that I won’t know what real love is until it’s through a child—which is complete bullshit. I believe that parenthood should be chosen, not forced. People should have the freedom to make their own decisions in life, and that includes decisions about parenthood. There should be no judgment or pressure placed on people who choose not to have children. Everyone should be free to make their own decisions without judgment or criticism. Parenthood should be a choice, not an obligation.

Social norms have changed dramatically in the last few years, particularly regarding family dynamics and individual priorities. There’s been a discernible shift away from traditional family structures, as more individuals prioritize their professions, independence, and self-actualization over having children. An increasing number of people are choosing not to become parents or delaying childbearing completely, which indicates this trend.

People frequently put off starting a family because they want to further their education and achieve financial security. When they finally feel ready, they may encounter practical and biological obstacles that make parenthood challenging. Raising children has become extremely expensive, especially in so-called “developed” countries where housing, healthcare, and education are increasingly unaffordable. Due to crippling costs, people wonder if they can even afford to have kids. Hesitancy is further increased by economic uncertainty brought on by inflation and job instability. Government measures that lead to economic volatility or complicate the process of achieving financial independence frequently exacerbate these problems. Furthermore, by lessening the perceived necessity for big families, which historically provided financial assistance in old life, welfare state programs may unintentionally discourage people from having children. These regulations may restrict family planning options and individual accountability. Such regulations can harm family stability, which can lead to a decrease in social mobility and an increase in poverty. These policies can be detrimental to the economy, as families are responsible for generating economic wealth and investing in the future.

For women, rebounding from childbirth in their careers presents unique challenges that men typically don’t face. After childbirth, women often encounter expectations to take on most caregiving responsibilities, which can lead to extended periods away from work. This time away can result in missed opportunities for promotions, skill development, and networking, making it harder to regain momentum in their careers. Additionally, the lingering effects of childbirth on physical health, mental well-being, and work-life balance can create further hurdles. Unlike men, who may not experience these same societal pressures or physical demands, women often must work twice as hard to re-establish their professional footing and prove their commitment in a workplace that may not fully accommodate or support their needs during this transition. 

Cultural and spiritual shifts also seem to have played a significant role in this trend. As religious influence continues to decline—rightfully, in my view—birth rates tend to drop as well. Historically, religious manipulation has shaped views on family, procreation, and the meaning of life. However, with the rise of secularism and materialism, more people are focusing on personal enjoyment, material success, and consumer culture—values that often clash with traditional ideas of family and legacy. 

Philosophically, there’s a growing trend of existential questioning and doubt about the purpose of life. Many people today are grappling with the complexities and challenges of modern life, leading to hesitation about bringing new life into a world that seems increasingly uncertain. From a spiritual perspective, these concerns reflect deeper questions about the nature of existence and whether procreation is truly necessary to fulfill one’s purpose in life. There is also a moral or philosophical dilemma presented by the idea of having kids in a turbulent world. Is it even morally justifiable to reproduce? For me, the answer is a resounding no. It may seem pessimistic, but I’ve seen no indication in any relevant field that the quality of life for average people will make any meaningful strides in the future. To reproduce under these circumstances would be to commit an act of irresponsible selfishness. The next generation would not only be inheriting a chaotic world but also the burden of having to cope with it. We should instead focus on creating a more equitable and livable planet for future generations.

As societies continue to evolve, it seems people are rejecting outdated norms that once dictated life choices, including the expectation to have children. This shift represents a growing desire for personal autonomy and the freedom to define one’s path without being bound by conventional roles. Rather than viewing this trend as negative, I see it as people making informed choices to ensure their financial stability and personal well-being. By opting for smaller families or choosing not to have children at all, individuals are exercising their freedom to live sustainably and responsibly within their means. This challenges the notion that large families are inherently necessary for societal prosperity.  This shift in family size could also lead to more sustainable and equitable economic growth, as well as improved quality of life for individuals. It has the potential to reduce poverty, reduce inequality, and create a more equitable distribution of resources.

In many ways, I think the movement towards fewer children reflects a collective shift towards greater personal freedom, and responsibility, and a redefinition of what it means to lead a fulfilling life. Ultimately, this shift may lead to a more liberated and spiritually enriched world, where people live in ways that truly resonate with their own beliefs and aspirations. This shift may also lead to a more sustainable and equitable world, as people have fewer children and more resources to support their quality of life. It can also help to reduce the burden on natural resources and the environment.

Adam Hinds is a retired Navy Chief Operations Specialist with 21 years of service and nearly a decade in the nonprofit sector. He is also an active US Coast Guard Auxiliarist and a volunteer firefighter. Holding leadership certifications, a Master’s in Christian Practice and Conflict Management, and a Bachelor’s in International Relations, Adam is currently pursuing a PhD in Public Policy/National Security. Passionate about problem-solving and societal betterment, he enjoys creating content with purpose and meaning, including his work with in.pencil (https://inpencil.live). 

You can learn more about his projects and endeavors at his personal website: adamhinds.net